Sexuality Plays in Jewish Culture

I am doing a research about sexuality plays in Jewish culture. From the history, we know how the Jewish descendants were enslaved by the Ancient Egyptian Pharaoh around 3000 years ago, later on The Kingdom of Israel was sent into permanent exile and scattered all over the world by Assyria and they believed that it is the destiny of their people to suffer until their King has rise as a righteous leader, gather them all to the holy land and build Kingdom of Heaven in Jerusalem.


Judaism is the first monotheistic religion that has been developed over a period of thousands of years. On 1000 BCE King David established Jerusalem as the capital of Israel that also known as Judah or United Monarchy and ruled the Twelve Tribes of Israel. Later on King Solomon takes over the throne and he built the holy temple, the nations are in peace and prosperous thanks to King Solomon intelligence and leadership qualities.


Jews comes from three group which is they were born in a Jewish family and has the bloodline whether they follow Judaism religion or not, second is those who have some Jewish lineage and background and the third is the one that have no connection whatsoever to Jewish but converted to Judaism and are followers.


There are various organizations and institutions that govern and lead the Jewish community on variety of issues, where there is no single governing body that decide or set out the rules or law.
The Jewish people has contributed so much on the progress of human development and knowledge, such as in business, politics, arts, sciences, astrophysics, metaphysics, civilization, history, peace and other fields and they received around 160 Nobel prize which is far out proportion of to the Jews compared to the world’s population.


1) Finding
I found that in Jewish culture, sexuality is very sacred and holy. Sex is the connection between a man and a woman and it is something that cannot be shared and cannot be own, sex must come from the commitment, willingness, and freewill. Love is just an alter hypocrisy, but true love can even make us go against the whole world. In Judaism, we can only have sex when we are married and once we understand love and love ourselves than only can we love others. Most of the laws regarding relationship are in the Talmud and according to the law, love and sexual activities cannot be force but it must come naturally from the needs to satisfy the thirst of pleasure in each other but sex is never been considered as sinful, shameful or obscene in anyway. In Jewish view, the sexuality is not the main idea or a tool to excites them but rather as a divine gift from their G-d Hashem in a spiritual holy way and when they focus their sexual power to divinity by also taking pleasure then they are not only characterized by self-denial and they are know as “tikkun hayesod”. This is why Judaism approach to sexual energy itself is fascinating and unique in its own way.


Since the time of Adam and Eve, mankind has been searching for the reason and meaning of life and sexuality itself, they try to define it, categorize, finding the definition and purpose and it is one of the most controversial topics because it is hard to find a common ground but in Judaism, this topic are in the middle ground stance and sexuality has been known as a “divine gift” from G-d and not only subject to procreation but also for the ultimate pleasure in life and social relationship. Judaism does not believe that there is something sinister or evil in sexuality but rather a natural urge same as our hunger and thirst and this is the most important factor in creating a healthy life. They also believe that we need to learn our sexual drive because when it is not controlled, it can lead to disastrous. Marriage is also sacred and it is the only allowable way for husband and wife to express their feelings of sexuality and avoid all the unnecessary temptation and sins that could occur in that period. Sex itself can become “mitzvah” or good deed and the purpose of a sexual relationship in marriage is to satisfy the needs and touch of the woman first.


It is also the fundamental belief of Judaism that sex is the essential rights of women and not men.


Sex is something that has been given but at the same time we cannot own or possess it. Sex is the most pleasurable experience because the unfamiliarity of the combination and the pleasure of being in intimacy. When we know someone really genuine and serious of having a relationship, we then tend to feel appreciated, the sweet sensual touch and grasp, and taken care off. In any relationship of sexuality regardless of the culture, gender differences causes a lot of differences in thinking, emotion and the way of approaching, therefore understanding and respect among each other are important and one cannot live without the other. Love should be a reality in our life, not just a poem or a dream.


The highest level of satisfaction and focus are the Jewish way to approach sex and the act must be holy. There are also explanation on when the sex is allowable and forbidden which is based on women’s menstrual cycle, pregnant, menopause or period and sexual relations are permissible when the women in “living waters” known as “mikveh”, which is the process of making the women clean and pure.


Jewish practice also want us to be conscious and aware the supremacy of sexuality, that need us to set a time between being together and the time for solitude. From rabbinic point of view and tradition, after a woman menstrual period, she has to immerse in a “mikveh”.


There are certain rules for the husbands to have relations with his wife, which is the required frequency to do his marital duty known as “onah” and the duration to perform the conjugal duty. Even though in Jewish culture and religion, the sex is the women’s right, the wife are restricted to avoid or withhold from sexual relations unreasonably and they must have responsibility and commitment toward each other as husband and wife and if the wife does withhold from the sexual activities, then the husband are free to divorce her without paying any divorce settlement as in “ketubah”. They must also show compassion if they want to succeed in relationship and sexuality.


“Negiah” or touch in English are one of the most important approaches according to Jewish culture, it can create the feels of ease, warmth, comfort, closeness, secure, create intimacy and make one’s feel affectionate. In Torah, the meaning of sex is “to know” or “Yot Dalet Ayin” and the main reason of having sex are to strengthen the bond of love and in Judaism sex and love is permanently link.


The positive uniqueness and specialness in limitless physical intimacy and love feelings are one of Judaism concept and developing a relationship are the first important step before moving in to the physical side. The connection between sexual drives to evil inclination known as “yetzer hara”, everyone tend to think that everything evil is bad, but that no apply to this situation when “yetzer hara” is not all that bad because we don’t have any “yetzer hara” then we will not going to be married, build a house, have a son or a family at all. “Yetzer hara” work as a motivation, as a tool to get us moving and using it as mean but not as an end.